I'll Never Be Her
by OxOx-Megz-OxOx
Summary: After two years of being a human, Katherine finally decides she is ready to see him again. Kalijah one-shot


It was two years after she was given the cure, that they met again.

It was mid-October, and the streets were laden with golden leaves. She made her way towards the bar, aware that she was already late. But she knew he wouldn't mind. They'd waited two years to see each other again; they could wait another five minutes. Her heels clicked loudly against the concrete, and as a cold wind blew, she pulled her jacket ever tighter around her. Her hair was swept out of her face in a loose bun, and she wondered if he would even recognize her.

She'd changed so much since he last saw her. Even her walk was different. She no longer walked with a confident stride, no longer looked down on people who she didn't deem "at her level". She dressed differently, talked differently, even did her _make up_differently. She was a completely different person. Not that she'd really even been a person before, really. She'd been a monster. But now, she was here to prove to him that she had changed.

Right before he'd moved to New Orleans with Klaus and Rebekah, he'd given her a piece of paper, with a number on it. He'd told her that he would wait, and that she could call him when she was ready. Of course, at the time, she'd completely forgotten about it. It had been a few days after she'd turned human, and she hadn't wanted to speak to anybody. She'd just locked herself up in her house, not wanting to come out.

She'd spent the first year of her new human life trying to find a way to become a vampire again. She'd begged, and pleaded with everyone, _anyone._She'd asked other vampires to turn her, and they'd tried, but it never worked. She'd asked witches, looked in books, talked to ghosts. Nothing. That year had probably been the hardest. When she realized that there was no way she could become a vampire again, she'd broken down.

The year after that, she'd spent trying to rebuild her life, and become somebody new. She'd kept her name, but changed everything else. She'd moved back to Mystic Falls, and had a small house not far from the square. She even had a job just outside the town. She'd built herself back up from scratch. And it had taken a _lot_of hard work, but she'd done it.

It had taken two years, but she was finally ready.

As she walked into the bar, she scanned the crowds for him. It was only three in the afternoon, but already, people were piling into the bar, and it was hard to spot him through all the people. She stood in the door well, until she spotted him over by the bar.

He was sat, all alone in one of the stools. There was a drink in one of his hands, and he was dressed in one of his suits that she loved so very much. She couldn't believe how much she'd changed in two years, and yet he'd stayed exactly the same. Then again, she didn't know why she should have expected otherwise. His hair was still perfectly tousled, and he was cleanly shaven. He hadn't aged a day.

"Elijah . . ." she whispered, almost to herself. However, she'd forgotten about his vampire-hearing. He turned in his chair at the mention of his name, and even across the crowded room, his eyes went straight to her.

After all this time, she still got chills when he looked at her.

She suddenly felt very nervous, and very out of place. She was dressed in tall, black boots, and a long, black coat. She looked nothing like the girl he'd fallen in love with all those years ago. The pounds of eyeliner were gone, as was the bright red lipstick. She looked much more natural now, and a few loose curls fell around her face, framing it perfectly.

He didn't think she'd ever looked more beautiful, and it showed.

"Katerina . . ." he exhaled, and gestured for her to take the empty seat next to him.

She took in a deep breath, relieved that, after all these years, at least his love for her hadn't changed. She began to undo her coat, and walked over to the bar, sliding into the stool next to him. And when she turned to him, she could see he was trying hard not to smile. She realized she was doing exactly the same thing, and the rest of the world just fell away around them.

"Please don't call me that," Katherine said, her tone light, but pleading. She was tired of hearing that name now. It wasn't her anymore, she was different now. She'd been Katerina, the pure-hearted human girl, with hopes of love and promises of forever. She'd been Katherine, the cold, cruel vampire, who neither felt nor cared. The girl who only looked out for herself, so that she couldn't get hurt. Who she was now, she had no idea. But she was keen to find out.

"I'm sorry, I . . . forgive me," Elijah apologized, scanning her with her eyes. He almost couldn't believe how much she'd changed in just two years. But she looked better now than she ever had before, even as a human. "How old are you now, if you don't mind me asking?"

"My actual age is five-hundred and forty two," she replied, looking down at the bar, smiling absentmindedly. Elijah raised an eyebrow, taking a drink. It must have been hard for her to readjust to becoming human again, especially as that had been the last thing she'd wanted. More than five-hundred years of being a vampire, and then she was human again, just like that. "But as a human, I just turned twenty-one."

"You're legal now! Let me buy you a drink," Elijah said lightening the mood, and Katherine laughed as he leaned over to the bartender.

She'd missed him, but only now was she beginning to realize just how much. They were together now though, and that was all that mattered. She couldn't worry about what was going to happen in the future, when she would grow old, and he would still be exactly the same. What would happen when she got to spend the rest of her life with him, but he couldn't do the same? She couldn't think about that now. All she could think about was how happy she was.

The bartender passed her drink across the bar, and Katherine smirked, before taking a sip.

"So how come you called?" Elijah asked, watching her curiously. "I mean, it's been two years, so . . . why now?"

"I just . . . I wanted to tell you that I've changed. I'm ready," she replied, setting her drink down. She saw his hand resting on the bar, and took it in both of hers gently. The old Katherine never would have done such an intimate thing, especially not in public. She had never wanted people to know that she _did_feel, that she _did_care. Emotions were a weakness, her past had taught her that much. But now, she was ready to open herself up to that weakness. "I love you, Elijah, I always have. And I probably always will. I know it took me . . . probably a little longer than it should have done to realize it, but . . . I'm ready to try and make things work between us."

"Kateri -" Elijah said, reaching for her with his other hand, but Katherine cut him off.

"I'm not her Elijah, I'm not Katerina anymore." she explained, "Whoever she was, whoever _I_was . . . she's gone. I've tried to get her back, believe me, I tried to, for you. But she's gone. She's not coming back. That girl . . . the girl you loved . . . she's gone, Elijah. And I'm sorry. She died a long time ago, but I think part of you knew that already.

But I'm not Katherine anymore either. I'm not afraid to feel now. I'm not afraid to open myself up to things, to how I feel about you. I'm not afraid to get hurt. You know, I kept blaming my past for the things that happened to me, for the fact that I didn't trust people. But really, it was my own fault. I was the only thing holding myself back. But I'm not anymore.

I don't quite know who I am anymore, but maybe that's a good thing. All I do know, is that I've changed. I'm not Katerina Petrova, and I'm not Katherine Pierce, I'm someone else entirely. And maybe I've changed for the better, I don't know but . . . . I'd like to find out. The only thing that I'm sure of right now, the only thing that I have no doubts about, is my love for you."

"Well . . . I guess you'll have to do."


End file.
